VILUNIUS.

The city of Mystery.

Captains Log Day 26 – 26/01/14 4:58pm.
Location: 11 Miesnieku Iela Riga.

Vilunius. Im sure most people reading this would have no idea where Vilunius
is. In fact as my Co-Captain and I disembarked our vessel we both looked at
each other going ‘What the hell are we doing here?’ – Vilunius is the capital
of Lithuania – once again the question still stands ‘What the hell are we doing
here?’

Upon leaving the place a heap of that was answered as both my
Co-Captain and I proceeded to wage another war with the country, and paint the
town. The color I chose was a tinge of vomit.

Before I get into the fun details. This city was beautiful. A small
town, overflowing with history. Picturesque with modern culture seeping in,
visible through the primo restaurants across old town and branded stores with
the likes of Burberry and Hugo, lining up the streets. The churches and the
castle were breathtaking.

A fun fact: By the end of the fourteenth century, Lithuania was the
largest country in Europe. Also beards freeze in minus 15 degrees with icicles
forming shortly after.

After our Sight seeing and fact finding adventure it was time to
execute plan: Vilunius nightlife.

We started Pre-Drinks shortly after. Watching fat pizza we have our
last drinks, just then there is a knock on the door. It’s someone who has the
wrong room, as typical Aussie hospitality goes its only reasonable to invite
this parched young chap into the room for vodka. He sits n we chat n drink.

It’s not long after that the bottle is gone and I’m feeling like
Charlie Sheen. We farewell our new friend and leave the room to head to the
club and I think after the 22nd or 23rd step my first projectile vomit makes a
appearance. This continues with 7 more occurrences before I make it to the
club. The canvas had begun to be stained. The club was epic with the most
beautiful of girls. I don’t recall the next 5 hours but I know a heap of drinks
were bought, a few more vomits and I later found out from my Co-Captain that I
was on the podium with the pole and a heap of Lithuanians video taping (next
youtube sensation?). I recall meeting am top UK Chick who was down for a
holiday, a new friend had been made. I then called the DJ down for a drink and
saying to him “In Australia we skull”, I skulled my drink, looked
down and threw up on his feet. He was not impressed and walked away with a sad
look on his face.

This proceeded by me wanting to sit in a private area and the occupant
not too happy with that decision. A bouncer was called and as he pushed me I
yelled “Do you know who I am!!! I’ll sue you! Don’t touch me!” I was
then lifted by the collar and physically thrown out. I must admit this is a
first for me. I thought it only happened in movies. Obviously not.

I left the club and got lost along the way. Very drunk, Exausted and
cold I decided to have a nap at the park. I assure you it’s not the wisest idea
at minus 16 degrees. I slept for about 2 hours and awoke when the sun was
coming up. I had a series of missed calls n messages from the Co-Captain.
Stumbling and Freezing, I waddled looking for our hotel. Falling over a few
times before I found it. Upstairs I went n found my Co-Captain assuming I had
died.

After a tough sleep , bruised palms and the worst hangover it was time
to say goodbye to Lithuania.

VILUNIUS: The city of Mystery