Barcelona. Spain

The reminiscent images from the Tomorrowland dream were still playing magical scenes across the Captain’s eyes as the vessel descended in the Spanish airspace.

Arriving with a touch of magic sprinkled over their hearts, the Captain and Admiral did not know what to expect from their first ever expedition to the land of bull fighting, sangria and siesta. Exiting the airport as the clock touched the devil’s hour, the duo shuffled along to join the long line of people heading to the heart of the megacity. Arriving exhausted, drained and a little physically and mentally broken, the heat embraced them. The Captain and Admiral disembarked the bus as the little hand ticked over to one. It was late, and the city nightscape resembled that of a late-night Manhattan, meaning that there were people around the streets, but not the people you would want to be around with on the streets. They decided that today they will not challenge fate as they caught a cab to the hotel, this time it was a wise decision as the late-night roughness of the city became evident behind the glass of our chaperon.

The place to stay was lock bang in the center of the city, however it was a mission to get up to the room, this included a lift, a few cases of stairs, then a hallway – there we found ourselves a tiny little room, with LED lighting (blue in some cases) and 2 single little beds. This was more of a crappy hostel than a hotel. The beds, the lighting or even the mold on the showerhead had no effect on the Captain, however as the sweat continued to drip down his brow he realized that the air-conditioning was only working in a trickle format, despite being on full. Asking the reception on the way down they were told, ‘that’s just how it is’ – stressed out they challenged the city as they looked for a place to get something to eat at two am. They walked down the street, often grasping their wallets and handbags, as they walked past pimps, prostitutes, junkies and homeless people – finally to arrive at the tourist strip called Las Ramblas, where to their surprise the same demographic existed along side a  large crowd of partygoers commuting between clubs or heading home . Most shops were shut but they were able to find a Pizza place that they could get some slices. They bought these and scurried home. It was along this path that the Captain’s body started to fail, a sore throat showing its ugly head, a cough developing, his exhaustion seemed to be getting the best of him. They quickly ate, showered and somewhere between praying for aircon and body failing the Captain fell asleep.

Day one in the city, began with a coughing fit and a cold shower, the air con had started to operate and the room felt livable once again. The Admiral and Captain instructed the Cleaner to make sure she didn’t turn off the aircon – of course this was only possible through the use of Google Translate. The Captain was feeling worse, he felt an infection brewing inside his chest as if he had been bitten by a Face hugger (alien movie reference).

Admiral took ranks of the head of Navigation and Entertainment minister as we headed out to explore the Spanish city. They headed first down Las Ramblas, this time the strip was nothing like they had experienced the night before, packed to the brim with foot traffic, thousands of people walked along the promenade which was laden with shops and restaurants. Shuffling along they reached the first pit-stop, the market La Bouqeria, this market was a theme park for the senses, with beautiful visuals, tantalizing smells and an orchestra of sounds. They walked through the sensational market where traders were selling, fresh meat, fresh fruits, produce from all around etc. what made this market even more special was the fact that you could buy, fresh juice or cut up fruits from the fruit seller, cheese slices and olives to eat from the deli etc. it was not only a trading floor but a food court. Here the Admiral grabbed a quick lunch of some fresh pizza straight out of the oven using fresh produce. This was not going to be their last time in these halls.

Back on Las Ramblas they headed towards the centre of the city Cataluña Square – Here the Captain saw some hop-on hop off busses and convinced the Navigator that this was the way to go. They were now cruising down the old streets of the city of Barci in the region of Catalan. The first stop was Barcelona Cathedral – here they jumped off right into the blistering heat, and came across the Gothic Quarter walking tour that was just about to start – Super excited about this tour the Captain did some Tour’ception and signed up for the tour within the bus tour. Here they learnt of the history of the Catalonian people, the history of Barci (awesome story about the city flag) and its roman roots as well as visiting places such as the favorite church of Gaudi (also used for movie shootings for; Perfume, Nicky, Christina, Barcelona – both of which the captain had not seen) as well as where Columbus was commissioned to go to India (but found USA instead). Intrigued and fascinated and albeit annoyed since we couldn’t go inside the buildings, they headed to the next stop of the Hop on bus. The cough lingering on like an overstayed dinner guest, the duo cruised along the city – the Captain super excited as he controlled his chest from exploding and the Admiral falling in and out of sleep due to the open top of the bus and the climate music. The tour came to an end and stomachs rumbling coincidentally as they walked the Las Ramblas strip, the search for the best Paella in town took precedence. The Admiral was able to find a restaurant that had excellent reviews however resembled a hole in the wall. They took the risk and were rewarded, despite the ghetto like appearance the food was AMAZING!  Turns out the place has been around for over 42 years and is famous for its Pealla. Content they headed back home hoping the cleaner understood their broken Spanish in the morning.

The night was rough, the Captain waking up all night suffering from the illness that had struck him. Feeling exhausted in the morning, it seemed the only way to beat this and not let it ruin the holiday was to go and see a professional. Turns out there was a hospital right across the road from where they were staying. If you’re a follower of the Captain, you’re probably thinking ‘here we go again’, the Captain himself was in the same boat. This was a relatively fast process, within 2 hours, the Doctor at the hospital had examined the Captain, taken an x-ray, given him a nebulizer and prescribed serious antibiotics. Another hospital visit added to the bedpost notches, the Captain felt a bit of relief, both physically (from the nebulizer for his asthma) and mentally (knowing that he was not dying). There was a lot to do, after a pitstop at the hotel for a power nap, the Admiral who was concerned as hell was forced to carry on as if the Captain was 100%, they were off site seeing once again, the objective: see all the walking tour things from the inside.

To fuel the tanks, they visited the market once again and were treated to some organic delights, eating or rather inhaling the food they set off for the days adventures.

First up Barcelona Cathedral, where the captain coughed on the 12 Geese that live inside, then to the Historic museum to cough on the underground roman city, and lastly to cough on the famous architects Gaudi’s private creation for a textiles merchant – The Casa de Batllo – more like Cougha de Strugglio. Here the Captain had the opportunity to cough and splatter all over Gaudi’s beautiful modern work, as he learnt about how modern art is interpreted (lack of corners, inspiration from nature, phlegm etc.)

Exhausted and due for his next round of antibiotics, they stopped by home before receiving word that a friend to the Captain had landed in Barcelona. Marshal Mark had landed from Melbourne and was set to join them on their adventure. They quickly scurried and headed to meet the Marshal at a random location prescribed by the Captain mid way between the hotels. Finding the spot alive with people and drinking on the streets, time got lost in a blur of beer, and conversation, amongst the blur were the doctors’ orders not to drink whilst on those antibiotics. The trio soon found themselves, ordering a second jug of Sangria which was made up of, half wine, quarter lemonade, the rest a mix of vodka, brandy and sugar. We all knew the second jug was a bad idea. They were soon amongst the hoard along Las Ramblas stumbling along, tossing between heading to the Clubs or partying it down the street – the street won. They were enticed into a bar where all the cocktails contained three-quarters sprits, the chasers were shots provided free of cost from the bartender who seemed to be on substances far stronger than our drinks. The downward spiral continued, it was not until 3 am that some logic prevailed and heavily intoxicated the Captain and Admiral bid farewell to the Marshal – as they were set to see him in Ibiza soon after, concerned with their lives and wallets they grabbed some Maccas and headed home.

Hungover AF. The Captain deserved the sleep. That being said it was day 3 and the final day that they had in Barcelona. It was also the day that they had been slotted in to see Gaudi’ s masterpiece, and the icon of the city Sagrada Familia.  As a build up to his magnificence we decided to visit the national park Gaudi had designed – Park Guell. Despite the sun being in its peak position we climbed a series of hills and steps to reach the footholds of the park. Sweating and coughing the captain was marveled by the parks beauty as the Admiral felt as if she was going to die of heat exhaustion. They explored the park, stopping to buy water, watching the flamenco show and admiring/ trying to understand the dizzy monuments in the park.

Leaving the park the Captain misjudged the heat and distance when making a call to ‘walk’ to Sagrada. The Google maps suggested 20-minute walk, took over 40 minutes as the Admiral and Captain fought the blaring heat. Like a majestic nirvana the Sagrada Familia started to appear before them. Gaudi’s most famous work, is still in construction 92 years after his death and over 100 since he started it. This massive church stands at 172 meters (one less than the tallest mountain in the region – as he believed that they shouldn’t go higher than what God built) this marvel, is visually stunning.  The fine details of the tower start to reveal themselves as the duo get closer. The giant structure was amazing. Photos cannot do justice to this. They both stood in awe as they stared at the structure. Soon they were prompted by the audio guide to enter, entering the church blew the mind of the Captain. If he thought the outside was stunning – the inside was far more beautiful. Shimmering lights of the glass panes resembling seasons, the pillars made like trees, the faces on the sculptures, the styles of Gaudi’s work were all showing a resemblance. Once again photos cannot do this justice as they stood in awe of the masterpiece.

Regretting leaving due to not only the heat outside but the inkling to stare longer at this work of art, the duo quickly found a local pub to refresh, here they enjoyed some delicious tapas and a fantastic paella. Refreshed and content the Captain and Admiral headed to the old Hospital – Recinte Modernista Sant Pau which was used as a hospital in the 17^th century and converted to a national heritage site. As awesome as it was both the Admiral and Captain were now architected out, a mixture of the intense heat and the monotone audio guides left them tired. At one point in the surgical room both collapsed on the floor near an amazing air vent, this only lasted short time as a Spanish guided tour found them lying on the floor hugging the vent – though the tour tried to ignore them, it seemed that they were now an OH&S hazard so the duo continued the visit and left Mr Vent.

Exhausted the duo headed back to town, arriving at the Picasso Museum, only to find it booked out. Disappointed (and slightly happy because they felt dead) they checked out the gift shop and visited the museum of modern art – which was a bit of an eye opener in terms of some very weird art inside. A bit grossed out they left the place.

Last on the list and a highly prescribed landmark is the Catalana Cerveceria – a very famous and very busy Tapas restaurant in the heart of the town. Over the last few days the Admiral had guided the Captain here, only to find a wait of an hour and a half plus – they did not take bookings. Both the days they had seen the line and been disappointed that they could not try the famous Tapas. Hoping that today was their lucky day they headed in, this time it was only 7pm very early for Spanish standards and the Admiral thought they could take the chance again.  The pair arrived and remarkably were advised that the wait was only half an hour. Sitting along the side shops, alongside others that were trying their luck, they registered their names and waited, only to be called up 15 minutes later. They chose to sit outside, but when visiting the bathroom, they saw the sheer size of this restaurant which took up 3 shops and seated probably 200 inside. The food did not disappoint, they consumed garlic prawns, grilled prawns, calamari, field mushrooms with egg yolk, fetta & tomato salad etc. they had over eight different tapas and were stuffed. Although the wait was worth it, the food was good, however both the Admiral and Captain Agreed that Melbourne does it better. As the meal came to an end, so did the Barcelona Adventure. The Captain and Admiral headed home, to pack and say goodbye to the city of Barci.