Petra. Jordan

The delirium is kicking in. The cause can be attributed to many different things, it could be due to the visually magnificent structure we just laid our eyes on, it could be due to our minds unable to comprehend the architectural magnificence of witnessing one of the 7 wonders of the world. In reality deep down we know it is due to the lack of sleep and being in 48 degree temperatures for the entirety of the day.

The captain is on the way to recovery, steroids coursing his veins helping fight the illness that ails him. 2 hours after laying our heads to rest the first of the three alarms that have been set to wake us for our adventure start to echo through the apartment. The clock flashes 4:00AM meaning it is time to freshen up and depart. Like Zombies on a mission for brains, we load our rental car with our suitcases and through our crusty eyes head to the domestic airport for our chartered flight to the edge of Israel – the city of Eiliat.

The security procedures begin once again, we are herded out of the line and taken to the side, “Why did you go to Indonesia? Where did you stay in Doha? How long were you there? etc. where rebel leader and the captain are let off lightly, co-captains Arab origins seem to hinder his agility through the country. We stand aside and wait, making a quick pit stop to pick up possibly the most Jewish thing ever – a Bagel Pretzel.

Interrogation complete we are on a small flight heading to the southern tip of Israel, city of Eiliat. Here we are joined by our tour guide, an elderly gentleman who greets us and introduces us to the other tour members. He briefs us on the administrative procedures of the border crossing into Jordan. We are taken to a heavily protected border, with snipers on towers and Israeli troops carrying heavy modified artillery. Scrutiny pursued as once again we are greeted with a round of 1000 questions. Passing yet another test we are lead to the border, here our tour guide bids us farewell and explains the process of what next.

The lack of sleep impairing our hearing ability we do our best to listen, and understand the consequences being the snipers that are standing on the watch towers. Just like that we are sent on our way – a 300 meter stretch to cross the border; a DMZ.

Jordan seemed like another world, we are greeted with smiles and let into the country as guests, minimal security checks and no questions (Thank god). A few visa stamps on our passport and we are sitting at a boarder café waiting for our Jordanian tour guide to take us on our journey to the ancient city of Petra. Whist waiting the squad decided to buy Arab turbans for the long journey ahead – when in Rome do as the Arabs do.

The tour guide is a middle aged gentlemen who has to be the king of dad jokes, with his guidance we board the bus and start the 2 hour journey across the dessert to Petra.
Despite our minimal sleep, the excitement that was overcoming us did not let us nap. We watched as the bus drove on, admiring the landscape and the stray camels.

After a few pit stops for water and pee, our bus finally reaches the city of Petra. I don’t think any of the pirates in our squadron can contain the excitement that has been brewing inside. The excitement that started to brew when General Joske mentioned a visit to Petra was… “Possible”. We left the bus to be welcomed by a scorching hot blaze of heat. In the air conditioning we had forgot that the outside torture was 48 degrees celsius. All of us glad we had bought the appropriate headgear, we then disembarked.

The following 4 hours at Petra were filled with intrigue and wonder. Once again words cannot describe the beauty and magnificence of the ancient city. The single Treasury building (which really is a tomb) taking over 80 years to build, by more than 100 people. The city was a booming center of trade. The strategic location allowed people to come and trade with security and comfort. The success of the city lay due to the water system that they had developed allowing them to use the rainfall and keep reservoirs for the dry months.

It is also believed that the source of the water is where Moses slammed his stick in the old testament. This is now a fountain and the water flowing through the city is believed to be sourced from that very same spot.

Over the years the city was taken over by different people that changed it as they ravaged the city, this included the Roman Empire, Constantine, and the Byzantine Empire. I don’t want to bore you with more history.

The place was everything you can imagine – a city in the dessert carved into stone. It is overwhelming to talk about. The colors, the sheer size, and the intricate detail and thought gone into creating the city is just indescribable.

We started walking with our tour guide, only to find he was a total and utter idiot who did not know anything except how to impress Chinese tourists with the amount of Chinese he knew how to speak.

Stealthily like the ancient Bedouins before us we detached ourselves from his tour and joined and ABSOLUTE Boss tour guide! Who explained every element of what we were seeing, the tombs, ancient houses and the temples. Every description of the historical foundation of the city had us begging for more. Our newly acquainted tour guide was a legend, he was so into it that if he heard even a kid interrupting his speech he would yell at the parents to shut them up.

Upon completing the tour and drenched with sweat as if we had taken a bath in our cloths we completed the tour and were asked to return to the bus area. We trekked in the heat, an hour back to the bus. At that point all three of us had been cooked like a Christmas roast.
Back in the bus we headed off to a quick lunch at a local Jordanian restaurant, this was to be our fist meal since Jaffa city the night before (bar the Bagel Pretzal). We ate to our hearts content, boarding the bus a few kilos heavier.

Half an hour into the 2 hour bus ride, the driver stopped. It seemed like the bus was over heating and had broken down. We sat in the bus, which soon started to resemble a sauna until help arrived, only to find that help couldn’t help. An SOS call was made for a replacement bus and after a little while and a lot of sweating we were on a replacement bus back to the border. We befriended a Mexican tax agent who went around the world collecting casino chips – this is a story for another day…

Arriving at the boarder the same process occurred, smiles in Jordan as we crossed and then a heavy Israeli interrogation hammer when we arrived on the other end. Completing the questions we met our old tour guide who was waiting for us. He greeted us and advised us we may miss our flight if we don’t rush. On the way he told us how in his younger years he swam across the red sea with the navy seals to see Petra, and how only some of them made it back alive, most of them being killed as they snuck across and back.

We entered the airport to find out that our flight had already commenced boarding, when we attempted to check in the security once again began with the long list of questions (all of which we had heard before) we were ready and wanted to make it to the flight. All of a sudden 3 security officers come and take our passports, they return and ask us to follow them. We are lead to a room and asked to wait inside, one by one each of us are called inside the room.

The first to be called is the captain. He is advised to sit and then take off his shoes, empty his pockets, remove all the money from his wallet and then strip to his underwear. He is then given makeshift cloth shoes and given a disclaimer to read. At this point the captain is wondering if he will be having 2 fingers up his bum, and how he was going to survive the trip walking like a duck. After reading the pamphlet he found out that it was a xray that they would conduct to see if he had any concealed explosives. The test was done, the captain asked to get dressed. As he was walking out he did a 2 finger salute implying a bum search, to the other lads, and he watched their faces drop and sadness overcome them. He giggled inside as he walked to the waiting area.

One by one the co – captain and the rebel leader returned, laughing hard as they honestly thought they were going to get probed. They re-united with themselves and their passports.
When we reached the gate – we were advised that the flight had left and the next flight (the last flight of the night) was in 3 hours.

We sat and we waited – exhausted beyond description, burnt to a crisp and counting the hours of sleep – 2 hours sleep in the last 46 hours, until finally at 11 pm our gate opened – it was time to return to Tel Aviv and make our way to our final Israeli adventure – Jerusalem