The city of glorious food, sun bleached beaches and Gypsy Pirates
Captains Log Day 14 – 6/08/16 5:24 AM. Singapore Airways.
Blessed, feeling Angelic the captain and the squad were soon amongst the clouds, farewelling their Middle Eastern pilgrimage, only to land in Athens a few hours later. Repeat the process after 4 hours and we land in Doha, one more time for just for fun, BOOM we are in Lanka.
A casual 24 hours and 3 continents later we are waiting for our bags which amongst a sea of Sri Lankans, and it is ttaking a lot longer than expected. Finally gathering our bags, we head outside and plan how the hell we are going to get to our secluded bunker for the stay in the city of Hikkaduwa.
First objective is to get to Colombo and then figure out bearings to get to Hikkaduwa. After being approached by a few dodgy transport individuals, we select the most notorious one and follow them to a small shuttlebus. The bus has a capacity for 20, but I count at least 25 people alongside the luggage of 25 people. This resembles Tetris. Choosing our slight comfort over convenience we democratically choose to skip this bus and wait for the next one.
Thirty minutes go by we board the second bus squeezing in our seats as we head towards Colombo bus stand. On our journey up we enjoy the views and compare our vision of the country, we discuss how it resembles, Fiji, India, Thailand etc. Finally the last stop arrives, we are dropped off amidst a sea of busses. We unload our luggage and start looking for our ride to Hikkaduwa, a democratic vote was cast and we all agreed that before we boarded the bus we needed to find the most hard-core traditional street eats place to have some dinner.
Managing to find a place where no one spoke English, with the menus in another language and the food looking like it had been sitting in the bain-marie for an extended period of time, we asked for 3 plates of food. The plates came covered in plastic glad wrap, we accepted these and walked along the bain-marie selecting our dishes based on color, texture and consistency (we had no idea what was in them) stuffing our faces and being full to the point of throwing up (not sure if it was the quantity causing the sickness in our bellies or the over eating at this point) we paid our extravagant bill of $4 AUD (total for 3 meals) and then said farewell (although I don’t think they understood what we said)
With our superior sign language skills, we figured out which was the bus to lead us to our resort location and unsuspecting we boarded. I want to take a minute right now to define this crazy transportation vehicle. The interior was brightly lit by green LEDs, there was a large 32 inch TV up the front showcasing some sort of voodoo singing competition, the side of the bus had large speakers lined up which were blasting audio that matched the gypsy visuals – we could only come up with one term for the vehicle – ‘The Gypsy Rocket Bus’
The Gypsy rocket bus ride was an experience. Stacked in and pushed together like eggs in an egg crate we started moving, people started jumping on and off miraculously, without stopping, as the bus moved through the city . We were on our way. The lack of air-conditioning and space had all three of us sticking together like pieces of bread in a toasted cheese sandwich.
Amongst the body heat we found ourselves passing out, only to be awoken as our bodies swayed due to some serious turning. The bus felt like it was about to Tip. We instantly noticed the speed that that the Gypsy rocket bus was going at, we were rocketing towards our destination.
Rebel leader established contact with a local who pointed out to them that we were in some sort of bus race with another vehicle on the road. Flying forward our estimates were that the gypsy bus was going at 120 – 140 km per hour as it curved along besides the beaches. We were now wide awake and at times found ourselves praying for our lives.
A few hours of gut wrenching, hot speed commuting later, a gentleman walks over to advise us that, not only had we won the Bus race, but we had arrived at our destination. Our sign language fails as we try to request a drop off to our hotel. 2am out in the middle of nowhere, Google maps comes to the rescue and advises us that we are 20 minutes away from our hotel.
As we start our walk the co-captain is unable to make his super powers of canine attraction, we are soon being followed by 4 dogs. Approaching our accommodation some sort of dog turf war breaks out, challenging or new friends. We avoid conflict as we enter our hotel. The first night ends with a few antics as the dog mask makes an appearance to the surprise room service.
Major objective of our stay in Lanka is to get suits made for the co-captains wedding, and with that objective in mind we hire a taxi and set off back to Colombo city, leaving our resort life behind.
After failing with our first tailor, we have a lot more luck with our second (Hercules tailors) ordering our suits with a caveat of 1 day turnaround time. The remainder of the night is spent visiting the infamous shopping spots including Petteh market.
Hungry we spend time looking and deciphering a local eatery suggestion pilaows (we kept looking for pill house). With great difficulty we locate the place and munch down on some very tasty kutthu roti and spicy chicken. Feeling full and accomplished we leave back to Hikkaduwa.
Arrival back to our temporary home we are welcomed with some long necked large beers. The captain and rebel leader feel mega restless as the co-captain is busy with some work, the fact that the bar is closed is the determined reason. Tipping the bell boy with cigarettes results in him telling us of a beach bar where we could still get hydrated. Leaving the co-captain to his work. We embark on a adventure to the lost bar. Walking across a crab infested beach we arrive at a very cool beach bar. Here we have our first drinks and chat to some other aussie pirates. After a while it is our cue to go and retrieve the co-captain, rushing home across the crab sea we grab him and bring him to the bar for good times. These however are short lived as the bar closes up not long after we place. At the hotel they decide to lock the captain in the toilet as revengr for drenching the co-captain. Shenanigans die down we prepare our bags for our last Lankan day.
POOL TIME! Our last day and our first opportunity to relax! The day is spent lazing in and by the pool, getting a Tan (burnt) and swimming. We make the most of it and have a massive feast at the hotel (crab cuttlefish and the next of Sri Lankan food is involved).
It feels like the time has flown, we get our bags ready and depart our paradise.
Luggage loaded, our first stop is the Turtle sanctuary, here we meet some pretty cool Dudes and play with these beautiful creatures. Unable to find nemo We depart and get to the tailors and realize our suits need some modifications. Sized up we head to do some last minute shopping and gift buying. Dropping by the Dutch hospital district for a sneaky cocktail as we say cheers to Sri Lanka and reminisce about our trip.
It is time go home. Our pilgrimage complete. Cameras full of photos, Heart full of memories and good times. Thus ends another trip of a lifetime.
Another Victory, yet the war is not over.
